Do's and Don'ts

DON'T do nothing or ignore the problem, hoping it is just a phase, get help.

DON'T confront your adolescent about drinking while he or she is under the influence.

DON'T make excuses to your spouse, family, friends or school authorities for your child's behavior.

DON'T take responsibility for your child's drinking/drug problem. DON'T accept as normal behaviour a stoned or drunk son or daughter who comes home and creates havoc within the family.

DON'T accept property damage as a result of alcohol or drug use or impaired behaviour as being acceptable.

DON'T nag, yell or scream about drinking or using.

DON'T clean up alcohol or drug created messes and predicaments.

DON'T let yourself be so ruled by the child's unacceptable behaviour that you let it pull down your own behavior too.

DON'T view your child as as lacking backbone or willpower

DON'T assume your child doesn't love you because of the way he /she acts when using.

DON'T be angry with your child if you can help it. Chemical dependency is an illness.

DON'T be patronizing or indulgent.

DON'T play amateur detective; following your offspring around the town to see what he or she is doing is, for the most part, a waste of time and strength.

DON'T give alcohol and/or drug abusing adolescent any money, except for minimal allowance.

DON'T give alcohol and or drug abusing adolescent the use of your car. They could kill someone.

DON'T think that passing grades or even good marks are indicative of there not being a problem.

DO ask for help if you think there is a problem with drugs or alcohol with your child.

DO wait to confront your child about his or her drinking or drug abuse until he or she is not under the influence. give protection for the child and others around him or her.

DO keep in mind that you are not responsible for your child's behaviour, but to him or her. Making excuses isn't necessary.

DO allow your child to take responsibility for his or her drinking or drug using behaviours. You are responsible for the environment.

DO provide consequences for drunken and loaded behaviour which cause havoc in family life or destroy the home. Also require restitution for any loss or destruction.

DO talk to your teenager about his drinking or drug use when sober.Keep communication lines open. Use "I" messages. eg. I feel afraid when I see you passed out on the floor.

DO allow your child to be responsible for his or her own messes and predicaments. He sat on the burner, let him sit on the blisters. Consequences are gifts.

DO allow your behaviour to be of you own choosing and not as a result of being brought down by your child's drinking or drug using behaviours.

DO view your child as being out of control rather than lacking in backbone or willpower. The addiction process is an illness.

DO remember that the way your child acts when drinking or using drugs isn't an indication of lack of love. The drug takes over the personality with drastic changes.

DO be patient with your child. Always let him or her save face with alternatives. You are responsible for setting the alternatives.

DO maintain consistent consequences for drinking and drug using behaviour.

DO respect the privacy of your child. Monitor behaviour and use fact as indicators instead of snooping. Use judgment if behaviour becomes self-destructive.

DO give your child minimal allowance for chores performed in the home.

DO present consequences that that you are willing and able to back up. Keep them logical and natural. Have child become involved in establishing the rules in your home.

DO attempt to become involved and communicate with your child. Encouragement is important for all ages. Kids are persons not "monsters" or "bums." Do seek information and support. You're not alone but part of a network.

Referral Process:
Simply call (416) 640-1061 to arrange for an assessment or interview.

Recovery Counselling Services
4211 Yonge St., Suite 302
Toronto, Ontario
M2P 2A9

Just north of York Mills, and the York Mills Subway, just south of the 401 on the east side of Yonge in the building where there is a Swiss Chalet.

Parking Available

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